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Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room The bear isn't dead it is just afraid to move."

"I'm sexually attracted to one of my students I knew that becoming a primary school teacher was a bad career choice"

"Nephew: Were the scorpions around when there were dinosaurs? Me: You mean like the band?"

"Where do country music artists become country music greats? The obituaries"

"How does an elephant go up a tree? It stands on an acorn and waits for it to grow."

"What's your favorite game if you wear a turban? Hide-and-Sikh"

"This chick at Walgreens is totally hitting on me. What's your name? What's your address? Do you have any questions for the pharmacist?"

"The rush I get from completing a crossword puzzle leads me to believe that trying hard drugs would destroy my life within hours."

"Wife smelled eggs and thought I was bringing her breakfast in bed. How do I tell her it was just me with gas?!"

"My love for you is like a fart. Everything about it is powered by my heart."