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Joke of the Day

"It's better to plagiarize from Encarta than from Wikipedia, because people actually read Wikipedia."

"I wear a diaper for two reasons... Number one and number two."

"What type of jokes do planets tell each other? Cosmic jokes."

"Why does Helen Keller only masterbate with one hand? She needs the other to moan."

"How I want to die... I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather...not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car."

"My mother's star sign was cancer. Ironic how she died, really. She died due to fatal injuries from a giant crab attack."

"And the Lord said, 'Let there be idiots.'"

"What is your best orphan/dark joke? This will hopefully be sfw but my have strong words."

"What do you call a wrongly accused art thief? Framed"

"Yo mamma is so fat when a bus hit her she said who threw the pebble."