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Joke of the Day
"What's a feminist's least favourite bread? Gender rolls"
Next Joke
"I should've never taught my parrot to say the alphabet backwards now he drives drunk all the time the cops can't do shit it's a real problem"
"What prize did the dead body receive? Atrophy"
"At school, I saw my principal walking around in a daze. I asked him whathappened, and he just looked at me and said, ""I've lost my faculties!"""
"Going to a bar within walking distance of my house reduces the likelihood that I will wake up partially clothed behind a dumpster tomorrow."
"Me: this is bullshit. conditioner and shampoo in one? impossible Walmart employee who I have in a headlock: sir I didn't make the shampoo"
"""Why?"" - Socrates and four year-olds"
"There's a new movement against cutting in line. Now that's a movement I can get behind!"
"My Wife and I made love today for the first time in weeks. (X-POST from r/shortscarystories) I put her back in the freezer afterwards."
"Q: What's the range of an accordion? A: Twenty yards if you've got a good arm!"