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Joke of the Day

"The cure for premature ejaculation is coming soon."

"What do a burnt pizza and a baby have in common? Some idiot pulled it out to late"

"[The Beatles writing Here Comes The Sun] Paul: so what should come after here comes the sun? [Ringo screams from bathroom]: Doo Doo, Doo Doo"

"*spends 30 minutes trying to unzip my pants to have sex for the first time* *girlfriend sighs* ""Just take off the mittens"" MY HANDS ARE COLD"

"A flyer says to another flyer: ""Yo, wanna hang out tonight?"" The other one replies: ""Brochure!"""

"I tried to use the bury a dog above a body trick the graveyard employee didnt let me"

"A guy walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, ""Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?"" The bartender shakes his head and says, ""No, we only have plain."""

"Batman Begins Crossdressing #AddAWordRuinAMovie"

"[job interview] Look. First, you give me a job. Then I get paid. THEN I'll be able to buy pants. I can't just skip ahead to the last step."

"What is Jasmine Tridevil's (girl with 3 boobs), favorite type of cake? Tres Leches!"