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Joke of the Day

"So much gross product placement in THE SHINING. It's like, fine, I'll buy an axe."

"I shot two camera lenses out of two cannons into each other at high speed... ...I wanted to make a kaleidoscope"

"What do you call a spaghetti that went to a pasta party? An Impasta"

"What does a witch do if her broom is stolen ? She calls the flying squad !"

"How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? Suck his dick"

"The Black Third Grader Goes To His Mom. He asks his mom, ""Mom, I have the biggest Dick in the third grade! Is that because I am black?"" She replies, ""Nah Nigga, its because your 19!"""

"Under 'medical history', we were hoping for something more specific to you personally. You wrote ""Fleming discovered penicillin in 1928""."

"What is an alto's favorite drink? High C!"

"I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus Good thing he didn't see what mommy did after bedtime ..."

"Do people really expect to have a satisfying experience on a website that ends with "".gov""?"