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Joke of the Day

"Anyone seen ""Captain Phillips""? If not, I have a pirated copy you can borrow."

"No Microsoft, I don't want to Send an Error Report. Snitches get stitches."

"What does a gay cow eat? Haaaay!"

"It can not get any worser. So I thought but as it seems I have really weak imagination."

"What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull terrier? Lipstick!"

"How do you make a chicken salad? Make a salad and give it to a chicken."

"What did the grapes say to their parents after they put them into a nursing home? Thanks for raisin us"

"And for his much awaited stunt, Ku Klux Knievel will attempt to jump 50 bIack kids with a steamroller."

"What is the most painful Russian dance? Tchaikovsky's *The Nutcracker*."

"What happens to the cannibal who is late to the party? He gets the cold shoulder."