66278

Joke of the Day

"79 million people are without access to drinkable water Though on the bright side, the number is decreasing!"

"just found out i like being called sugar butt. 35 years of feminism down the fuckin drain."

"I'm going to a medieval wedding and I need some one liners."

"The Sea A husband says to his wife: "" -Honey, you remind me of the sea..."" "" -That's really sweet!"" "" -No, you just make me sick."""

"Pimples are a rising issue And a pressing matter"

"I just found the worst page in the entire dictionary... ...What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest, and disingenuous."

"Why do husbands die before their wives? They want to."

"Why did the witch lose her way? Because her hat was pointing in the wrong direction."

"Why did the Cephalopod get coal for christmas? Because he was on the nautilust."

"Setting a teachers salary based on student performance is akin to paying a zookeeper based on how well the monkeys are behaving."