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Joke of the Day
"Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you a flat minor"
Next Joke
"It's your choice. Half of all marriages end in divorce. You think that's bad? The other half end in death."
"What's the best side to eat from a chicken? The inside."
"I was checking into a hotel the other week....."
"A towel walks into a bar... He orders a drink, and says ""I'll have it dry."""
"[slams on the brakes] WHAT DO YOU MEAN LINDSAY LOHAN PLAYED BOTH TWINS IN THE PARENT TRAP"
"me: this cat is kissing me on the lips because it LOVES me cat: mother's lips taste perpetually of bacon"
"I think it's weird that characters in comic strips always recite the alphabet to fall asleep... ...But it's even weirder that they always time it exactly fucking perfect."
"What do you call a nun using katana? Nunja."
"Some people passed away from toxic fumes in the apartments I constructed. I was just making the ceilings asbestos I could."