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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a happy programmer and a sad programmer? ""Hello, world"" and ""Goodbye, cruel world"""

"35,000 black people walked into a bar... According to the Louisiana Official Ledger, Jurisdiction Kudrow."

"Couples have an amount they can spend up to without discussing with each other. Mine is around $50. My wife's is around $643.27. Apparently"

"My doctor said I shouldn't hug people, admittedly it was 10 years ago when I had the flu but I still use that one."

"Based on the number of nurses on twitter, I now know why I'm bleeding to death in the ER."

"If Captain America's shield is vibranium, then... Hawkeye's shield is Quicksilver"

"Everyone in my class is autistic What else would ya expect in the Hahvahd School of Aht and Desahn?"

"I named my iPod ""The Titanic"" Oh look! It's syncing now."

"Why are native South African Tribesman immune to lightning? 'cause you can't Shaka Zulu."

"The reality is that a lot of girls out there just aren't prepared for a nice, decent guy."