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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs? A condescending con descending (duh dun dun chh)"

"I used to be addicted to frozen sandwiches But I decided to go cold turkey."

"Why did the farmer win an award? He was outstanding in his field."

"What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? If you slap the mosquito it stops sucking"

"Cocktail bar.. Wife went to a cocktail bar, she asked the barman for a double entendre ..,so he gave her one."

"What kind of goat did Houdini have? A scapegoat."

"The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza store... and says, ""Can you make me one with everything?"""

"*tightens straps on electric chair* Any last words? -I think male oysters should be called boysters Omg will someone throw the damn switch"

"What do you call a lesbian Dinosaur? Lickalotapus"

"What did the monkey say when he was on a winning streak? I've banana roll lately."