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Joke of the Day
"A Roman walks into a bar... ... holds up two fingers, and says ""Five beers please!"""
Next Joke
"My dream job? That's easy: Be one of those Muppets that sit up in balcony making fun of everyone. That's Old School Twitter."
"What do you call the guy who envies his friend's gelatin? Jello-us"
"The rich need it, the homeless has it and if you eat you'll die. Answear: Nothing! The rich don't need anything, the homeless has nothing and if you eat nothing you'll die."
"Why do ghosts never age? They use Bootox."
"A criminal burgles into a dormitory... He yells at one of the students: ""I'm looking for money!"" The student calmly replies: ""What a coincidence, I am too!"""
"My weight loss plan is to skip breakfast and lunch... And then eat seven dinners."
"I bet most braille on public signs says: ""How did you know this was here?"""
"I love it when a girl takes control. Birth control specifically."
"Don't bite the hand that feeds you. There's barely any meat on it. Go for the thighs."