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Joke of the Day

"It's leaked that Caitlyn Jenner is winning the ""woman of the year"" award. Oh so now they're implying that men are better at being women than women are."

"I told a boy I loved him once. We were 6. He punched my arm & stole my cake. Life lesson. Never lose sight of what's important. #Cake."

"Just realized the laundry detergent has been in the refrigerator for 3 days, in case you're looking for a business manager."

"If humans were chickens, the French Revolution would've been a lot funnier... because after cutting someone's head off, their headless body would run around a few times."

"Descriptivism is the right way of managing the English language, irregardless of what you think."

"My favorite sex position I called wow Its when I flip your mom over."

"my doctor asked if it burns when I pee. I said only when it gets in my eyes."

"How do you separate the men from the boys in Sparta? With a crowbar."

"I called a dentist.. I: I would like an appointment. Dentist: Sure, what time would you like to come. I: Two thirty."

"Does anyone want to buy a used Theremin? I haven't touched mine in years."