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Joke of the Day

"All of the world's natural disaster met to decide which one was the worst. Avalanche won by a landslide."

"I wonder how many people come visit our country and then immediately leave after trying a slice of American cheese."

"Used to go out with a girl who'd punch me in the face each time she had an orgasm. I didn't mind too much until I found out she was faking them."

"Having a dirty mind makes ordinary conversations much more interesting."

"What's the difference between OP and Fed-Ex?"

"Everybody in the village agreed that I did an excellent job of sewing their mouths shut. After I left, they were humming my praises."

"It's Earth Day... FUCK Uranus!"

"I know blood in horror movies is just corn syrup, but it's still terrifying because at this point, that's basically all my blood is"

"I don't know how Valve managed to do it, but... they even included the British Pound in their summer sale this year."

"What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college ? Bison."