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Joke of the Day

"I don't know why people use odorless deodorant It makes no scents!"

"Don't be afraid to speak your mind but know when to shut the fcuk up."

"I can't date fat women anymore... I just found out I'm lactose intolerant. Note: I just heard this from some landscapers as I walked my dog."

"What would Donald Trump do if he doesn't win the election? He'll start his own brand of ""Government"""

"Why does Josh Brown beat his wife? Just for kicks"

"Knock, knock. ""Who's there?"" ""Annie."" ""Annie who?"" ""Annie body home?"""

"Helen Keller, what color is this dress? ARGGGLLLAGHHHHGAAAAA"

"My mate asked me why I have sex noises saved on my ipod. ""I said, ""It's for sound effects during sex."" ""He asked, ""Your wife a bit quiet in the sack?"" ""I replied, ""No, I work in a morgue."""

"2 antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent."

"I can produce silver just by sniffing. Smelt it with my own nose. **I'll show myself out**"