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Joke of the Day

"I've heard making the perfect salad can be pretty difficult... Not exactly **rocket** science though, is it?"

"What is the best tool for getting a handle on your gambling addiction? A vice grip."

"I almost got raped in jail one time. I tell you, my family takes Monopoly way too seriously."

"Trump's gonna be sooo mad when he finds out that China realized building a Great Wall didn't keep foreigners out 400 years before he did."

"[Noah's Ark] Noah: How will the animals reproduce? God: You took a male & female, right? Noah: YOU SAID BRING 2 YOU DIDN'T SAY 1 OF EACH SEX"

"How did the man get the woman into the pool club? He snooker in!"

"What do you call someone who crashes flying dinosaurs into buildings? A pterrorist"

"If you're not part of the solution... ... you are part of precipitate."

"knock knock......... who's there?? an old joke p.s. Today is National Tell an Old Joke Day"

"Thousands of bird droppings are found on a playground.... Police suspect fowl play."