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Joke of the Day
"I think I finally found your G-Spot. It's been in my wallet the whole time."
Next Joke
"Doing crystal meth lowers your risk of dying from cancer... by raising your risk of dying from crystal meth."
"How many Germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. We're very efficient and not very humorous"
"A fat person doesn't eat what's right but eats what's left."
"*seductively moistens your lips with the meatloaf"
"They needed three Back to the Future movies so they could cover life's three great concerns: one's birth, one's future legacy, and cowboy"
"Batman: Life isn't a video game. Your actions have consequences *Robin writes 'I'm sorry I forgot to buy Charmin' 100 times on Batpaper*"
"A guy shows up late for work Off to work A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells, You should've been here at 8.30!' He replies. Why? What happened at 8.30?'"
"Some girl just caught me staring at her crotch so I gave her two thumbs up. She only deserved one, but it's the holidays and shit."
"Got in trouble with the wife at dinner time last night. Apparently when she asked me to turn on the veg, fingering her disabled sister isn't what she meant."