63130

Joke of the Day

"[wedding reception] DAVE IS HAVIN A SEIZURE Paramedic: How long has he been having convulsions? IDK HE'S WHITE, I THOUGHT HE WAS DANCING"

"I'm dating a supermodel with hemiparesis. She's not half-bad."

"A kid asks, ""Mommy, how come I'm black and you're white?"" The mom replies, ""Listen, the way I remember that party you're lucky you don't bark."""

"A xenophobe eh? I'm scared of the warrior princess too but I wouldn't call it a phobia."

"I'm not usually vengeful, but when I am it's because someone gave my kid a whistle."

"If Trump and Hillary are both drowning and you could only save one... What type of sandwich would you make?"

"Tried to catch fog today Mist"

"Friends and Family of Jedis should be called ""The Force Kin"""

"My new years resolution is to have more sex! I Haven't told my cellmate yet though"

"""Why is there a jar of pickles in the bathroom?"" ""I like pickles."" ""Do you eat them when you're on the toilet?"" ""Ewww! EAT them?! Gross!"""