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Joke of the Day

"How many moths does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, but more can join in if there's room in the lightbulb."

Next Joke
 
"BABY COW: [points at human] What's that? OLDER COW: That is a milk dracula"
"Today I connected all the freckles on my arm with a Sharpie. It spells out RIKSHAZ9LIRK. Clearly I am The Chosen One."
"If by self-help you mean helping myself to all the liquor in your cabinet... Then yeah... I'm about as self-helpful as they come."
"Jesus: Those were the times when I carried you son Me: And when the vending machine ate my dollar? Jesus: That time you bought me a Snickers"
"Tectonic Plates One tectonic plate said to the other, ""I'm addicted to crack"". The other said, ""It's your fault"""
"If you are on fire, my advice would be to get off fire."
"Eaten so many blue cheese stuffed olives today that it feels like France and Greece are waging a war for land in my intestines."
"What kind of fish is made of only two sodium molecules? 2 na"
"I still miss my ex-girlfriend occasionally Sometimes I'll get to my hiding spot outside her bedroom window just minutes after she's left"