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Joke of the Day

"A baby crawls into a bar... He asks the bartender for a milk. The bartender says, ""I guess you want that in a bottle?"". The baby replies, ""What do you have on tit?"""

"How can people get engaged after dating less than a year? You haven't seen their fall wardrobe yet and tbh it could be a deal breaker"

"Police: Cover me Rookie: ok [pulls out guitar] Every little thing she does is magic"

"Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock KNOCK KNOCK. Who is there? The pilot."

"What do you call the mercury mine? Hg wells"

"What do you get if you are telling puns while jogging? A running joke."

"How do you fit an elephant into a Safeway bag? Take the ""f"" out of the word ""way"". (get it yet...?)"

"A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""We don't serve food here."""

"North Koreans believe they live in the best country in the world because they're brainwashed by the government and the media. When everyone knows that America is the best country in the world."

"Did you hear Bruce Willis tried to overdose on viagra? He wanted to Die Hard."