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Joke of the Day

"he's not all bad: after an 12 hour shift at a local food kitchen, mayor Rob Ford selflessly turned down a hot meal. ""I've got more than enough to eat at home"""

"What a kid I got I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. 'creds: Rodney Dangerfield'"

"I painted my computer black to make it run faster. Plugged it in and high voltage sho(r)t it."

"How many programmers does it take to screw in a light-bulb? None, that is a hardware problem."

"Dark jokes are like food... Only some people get it."

"Did you all hear about the new terrorist group called Al-paca? The leaders name is Olama Bin Laden."

"What is the most important thing to learn in chemistry?Never lick the spoon."

"Fred: ""I can't believe Ben is in the hospital. Just yesterday, I saw him with a gorgeous blonde."" Bob: ""So did his wife."""

"Old tourist joke German tourist arrives at a French airport. Immigration officer asks him: ""Occupation?"" The German replies: ""No, no, just visiting."""

"I can't help but be disappointed at the brand new Rolex I received for my birthday from the lesbian couple next door. ... I think they misunderstood when I said, ""I wanna watch."""