61201

Joke of the Day

"What did the green grape say to the purple grape? ""Breathe you idiot! Breathe!"""

"Words can't even describe how beautiful you are. But numbers can, 3/10."

"Why do priests wear underwear in the shower? They don't like to look down on the unemployed"

"How does a penguin keep itself hydrated? His waddle bottle."

"9 out of 10 therapist agree to just be yourself The other one realizes that's what got you into this shit in the first place."

"I don't have a horse running in the Derby but my money is on Sarah Jessica Parker."

"What happens when a frog's car breaks down? It gets toad away.."

"Why don't you make like a tree & get slammed into by my drunk uncle on Halloween 97 why didnt you call a cab Uncle Gary we miss you so much"

"Q: Why was the young bear so spoiled? A: Because his mother ""panda'd"" to his every whim!"

"Why can you never get caught with a 0 in math? because cot(0) doesn't exist ... This joke... it burns my eyes..."