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Joke of the Day

"I think I can fix one of your ripped shirts. Well sew it seams anyway."

"There has to be a line where 9/11 jokes aren't funny anymore... For me it's somewhere around the 70th floor. I'm sorry, I know that was terrible. I'll see myself out."

"A roofer is working on a house and makes a mistake and falls through the ceiling and into the house. One of the guys inside says, ""nice of you to drop in."""

"How do you get teh bee off the toilet? You piss it off."

"Things you don't say while attending a group for sex addicts. I'll start... ""I'm glad you came."""

"If love at first sight was really a thing, I would've been married to Cheetara from Thundercats"

"What do you call it when a feminist yells so much she spits on your face? A femijizm"

"How far can this plane go with just one engine? All the way to the crash site!"

"What happened to the butterfly that ate too much marble? He shaterpillar."

"I have now lived in New York long enough that I can eat a meal while running at full speed."