60446

Joke of the Day

"I could lose 120 pounds in less than a week, but apparently there's some kind of silly NewYork law against killing your ex."

"Why did the chicken cross the basketball court ? He heard the referee calling fowls"

"User interface? I hardly even know her."

"""I love my cable company! Their customer service and pricing can't be beat! I'm glad I have no other options!"" said no one ever."

"What do you call a Chicken staring at lettuce? Chicken Caesar Salad"

"Me: I don't know how to dance to this kind of music Beer: yes you do"

"Are people in wheelchairs okay with jokes being made about them? I don't know where they stand on the issue."

"Never accept a rap battle from a cricket unless you know more than five words that rhyme with chirp."

"It's difficult to explain puns to Kleptomaniacs... they always take things, literally."

"Faster than a speeding bullet ...... more powerful than a locomotive ...... able to leap tall buildings in a single bound...... yes, these are some of Chuck Norris's warm-up exercises."