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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a tease, a love, and a lust? Spit, swallow, gargle."

"I was walking through Home Depot yesterday when I tripped and knocked an industrial vacuum cleaner onto a bunch of carpentry tools. It sucked on so many levels..."

"Today i learned that dolphins are the only animals other than humans that enjoy sex! I'm not sure if it was worth getting banned from all those zoo's to find out though"

"Why did Papa smurf go to the aviary? Because he loves blue tits."

"What was the last thing to go through Princess Diana's head before she died? Her asshole."

"At first I didn't like my new haircut but it slowly grew on me."

"Perhaps Bieber wouldn't need to vandalize walls with graffiti if the restaurants that he goes to would offer him a coloring menu with crayons."

"[Jail] INMATE: I killed a guy. SCOOBY DOO VILLAIN: I got caught trying to haunt an old warehouse by a bunch of teenagers and a talking dog."

"My black friend asked me where to find the color copier I said it's 2015 and he can use whatever copier he wants to"

"If they could, cats would correct your grammar."