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Joke of the Day

"Art Teacher: your drawings are due tomorrow me: [hours later] maybe add in some grapes police sketch artist: ..a bowl of fruit attacked you?"

"What do lesbians cook for dinner? Nothing; they eat out!"

"Why do Jewish people have big noses? Air is free"

"True procrastination is a lost art Those who completely mastered it's practice never got around to teaching anyone else their secrets."

"What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones."

"Mr. and Mrs. Needle were so proud of their son when he grew up to be an upstanding citizen. While growing up, he was a little prick."

"My girlfriend has this weird fetish Where she dresses up like herself, and acts like a total bitch"

"I could tell you a joke about a plane... But it'll probably go over your head..."

"Where can you find the best Black Friday deals with items at 100% off? Ferguson!"

"What do you call a window that can rap? Two Panes"