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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the white supremacists chemist with a lisp? He was so radium carbon iodine thorium he joined the potassium potassium potassium."

"There are only two things certain in life death, taxes, and people who can't count."

"Why did the lizard take viagra? He suffered from a reptile disfunction."

"Alright. It's Sunday. Another Breaking Bad. Or if you don't watch the show, an hour of confusing tweets."

"My friend had to step in as the lead of Little Shop of Horrors at the last second. He was Suddenly Seymour."

"I should never read tweets at work because I laugh out loud and everyone asks what's funny and I have to say this excel spreadsheet."

"I was always told by my father to fight fire with fire... ...And that's how he got kicked out of the fire brigade."

"They should just rename double stuffed Oreos to regular Oreos. And rename regular Oreos to ""Do it Yourself Double Oreo Kits""."

"I was going to tell a Mexican joke... but that's just crossing the border"

"An Atheist Walks Into A Bar... An Atheist walks into a bar with God, Thor, and Zeus. The bartender looks at him and says ""Drinking alone again, I see..."""