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Joke of the Day

"Which murderer is the safest to be stuck in an elevator with? The ax murderer of course. He will always ax you before murdering you."

Next Joke
 
"Dear Santa, Please send gift cards. Your taste has gotten significantly worse in recent years."
"my dad told me this one Helen Keller walks into a bar, then a table , then a chair"
"Me: I want to buy this chicken Farmer: Ok. Gonna take him home and eat him? *imagines self fighting crime with new chicken buddy* Me: Yes"
"I witnessed a murder today... Though it may have just been a flock of jackdaws, I'm not a biologist."
"Short armed and dangerous. Did you hear about the mind reading midget that escaped from prison? The papers said small medium at large."
"What did Ahab say when Moby Dick raised his tail? Whale shit!"
"Funny that when a guy sleeps with tons of girls, he's a stud.. But when a girl sleeps with tons of guys, somehow I'm not one of them."
"[OC]What do you call a shrunken walrus? A smallrus."
"A barber, a hairdresser, and bigfoot walk into a bar... You know what...I'm gonna shave this joke for another time."