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Joke of the Day

"A doctor reaches in his jacket for a pen.... and pulls out a thermometer. ""Oh great, some asshole's got my pen!"""

"What do you call it when a hedge fund manager loses his job to a Watson inspired AI built by IBM? It doesn't matter. We'll all be laughing too hard to care."

"Everyone knows Superman's father was Jor-El, but no one ever mentions his germophobic uncle, Pur-El."

"Steve Irwin died as he lived With animals in his heart."

"I heard a rude joke about Grizzlies the other day... ...but it doesn't bear repeating."

"Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere"

"Quantum Mechanics Knock Knock joke quick one: knockknock who's there quantum mechanics quantum mechanics who? You won't know until you open the door O_O"

"Why is Tumblr so odd? Because they can't even."

"What is that the more you desire, the less you can get? Beautiful girls."

"I think we all know who the big fat loser was tonight... Rosie O'Donnell"