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Joke of the Day

"Victoria's Secret recently invented a bra that contains Bluetooth speakers ... ... because so many women had complained that men stare at their breasts instead of listening to them."

Next Joke
 
"Did you hear the new penalty for speeding in Illinois? The first offense they give you Bears tickets and the second offense they make you use them."
"A group of crows framed my best friend for a crime he didn't commit I swear I'll find the murder who criminalized him!"
"What's long and hard on a black guy His prison sentence I hope this hasn't been said before, I half came up with this all by my lonesome"
"Beer before liquor, alphabetical order"
"Jokes to Cheer someone up Okay, my best friend is feeling down, and I want to help cheer her up. Give me your best jokes for the occasion!"
"*watching husband sleep* Me: ""I just love him so much, he's my everyth-"" *husband snores* Me: ""I can't live like this."""
"What's long and hard every time you wake up? Getting out of bed. You never feel like it making hard to get up and you usually take a long time to."
"[1st day in Senate] Me: I'm against genetic engineering Scientist: We've developed kids w/ volume knobs Me: How much funding do you need"
"Why was Moses' wife angry? He gave her the burning bush."