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Joke of the Day

"Just bought a thesaurus at the store and brought it home to find out the pages are all blank.... I have no words right now to describe how angry I am."

"Little Known Fact: Bon Jovi has five brothers: Bon Joi, Bon Joii, Bon Joiii, Bon Joiv and Bon Jov"

"(alternate) My wife asked me why I carry a gun around the house To kill the hallucinations I said She laughed. I laughed The toaster laughed I shot the dog"

"How does Hilary Clinton clean her glasses? By wiping the mainframe."

"Come on, terrorists. Stuff your pockets with colorful beads before exploding. It doesn't have to be ALL negative."

"A guy walks into a bar and says, ""I'm going to shoot whoever slept with my wife""! A man shouts from the back, ""You don't got enough bullets, bud""!"

"Constipation: Same shit, different day."

"""I'm going to France next summer."" ""Oh, really?"" ""No, De Gaulle."""

"A police officer sees a kid on the street.. He says, ""Its getting late kid, shouldn't you be getting back to the orphanage?"" Kid says, ""I guess so, what gave me away?"" ""Your parents did."""

"The rising new trend is "" An@l Bleaching "". Usually I would be against such an activity ,but....Some ***holes do need to LIGHTEN UP !!"