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Joke of the Day

"If your mom calls you a son of a bitch, you might be a redneck."

"""Let's eat, Pappy."" Not ""Let's eat Pappy."" Proof grammar saves lives."

"Greek cheese turns me on. It is a feta-ish."

"Did you hear about the idiot who had a new bath put in? The plumber said ""Would you like a plug for it?"" The idiot replied ""Oh I didn't know it was electric."""

"Titanic the boat cost $174 million, Titanic the film cost $200 million. Why didn't James Cameron just rebuild the ship and sink it for real?"

"I watch zombie movies to prepare myself if one day it really happens. Same for porn."

"How long does it take an Ethiopian Women to take a shit? 9 Months."

"If by raw food you mean cookie dough, then yes, I love raw food."

"Hey, black licorice, stop calling yourself ""candy"". You are nothing but a chewy fart and we both know it."

"Why do prescription pills always say ""by mouth?"" Where else would people put th... Ooooooh."