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Joke of the Day
"""Pick a lane! Any lane!"" - I hate commuter magicians."
Next Joke
"Rape Such a short word for such a long sentence."
"Son, there's only one thing in life to fear. [Car full of bears with machine guns drives by] Son, there are only two things in life to fear."
"Dominos just called to let me know my pizza's on the way. They correctly assumed I'd need time to find my pants."
"Woman equalities."
"Did you hear that Elon Musk announced plans for a restaurant on the moon? He said we can count on good food but no atmosphere."
"Don't listen to people who tell you not to stay up late. They're just trying to trick you into being a well-rested person who isn't anxious."
"I would lose weight, but I hate losing."
"Did you hear the one about the sexually promiscuous citrus fruit? He got lemon aids."
"Who cooks in a lesbian relationship? No one, they both eat out."