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Joke of the Day
"A baby seal... ... walks into a club."
Next Joke
"Let's say weed does make me dumber. Then you should be thanking me for levelling the playing field."
"I got so drunk the other night that I lost my glasses. The rest is a blur."
"I was playing guitar then my 2 year old took my guitar pick and dropped it somewhere. ""Where is my pick,"" I said. He replied ""Oink Oink! "" I repeated the question but got the same answer every time."
"Every woman thinks her husband is a moron. And they're absolutely right because smart men don't get married."
"What subreddit do unborn babies use? Pro Life Tips."
"So embarrassing -- I was scrolling thru an ex's old photos and accidentally liked one & then called her & told her I still love her & cried"
"If crime doesn't pay... ... than you're doing it wrong."
"Confidence A driverless car company announced that they will not sell their product to people who have less than five years' driving experience."
"Why did the woman sky-diver wear a jock strap? So she didn't whistle on the way down."