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Joke of the Day

"They updated the Raggedy Ann doll to Swaggedy Ann. She comes with an iPhone, divorced parents, and 3 pairs of heelys"

"What do you call... What do you call it when a person in a wheelchair tries to get through a non-automatic door? A tard time"

"My girlfriend told me I needed to be more affectionate... So I got a second girlfriend."

"Well, I'm going to take a hot shower. Its like a regular shower, but with me in it."

"An accountant at a bank was constipated Apparently he couldn't budget, but he worked it out with a pencil and paper and it was all good."

"How do you know your girlfriend is too young? You have to make airplane noises to get your dick in her mouth."

"English, if I ran it: A group of geese is called a ""group"" A group of buffalo is called a ""group"" A group of catfish is called a ""group"""

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Frozen Barbie on a Stick ...in your grocer's frozen food section"

"What's Hitler's least favorite planet? Jewpiter"

"How did Barack propose to Michelle? He got down on one knee and said: ""I don't want to be obamaself"""