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Joke of the Day
"Whenever I wear shorts it looks like I murdered a fat toddler and stole his pants."
Next Joke
"What's the difference between a baby and a pie? I didn't cum in the pie before I ate it."
"What do you say when Kanye West does something that annoys you? Kanye not."
"Q - Why are bachelors thin, and married men fat? A - Bachelors come home, check to see what's in the fridge, and go to bed. Married men come home, check to see what's in the bed, and go the fridge."
"What do you call a US Marine with an IQ of 70? General"
"What do you call a spider that likes 80s music? A Durantula."
"Why are so many guys mean to their girl friends ? Because of the [central limit theorem](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Central_limit_theorem)."
"""Does your dad play any sports?"" ""No, my dad hates sports"" *dad walks in* ""Hey there, Sport"""
"Did you hear about the couple of gay Irishmen? Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald."
"Slash: Ok whats Paradise City like? Izzy: Pretty girls? ""Yeah!"" Axl: Nice lawns! ""Huh?"" Axl: Green grass! ""Grass is alw-"" Axl: JUST WRITE IT"