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Joke of the Day

"If you want to touch the sky... Fuck a duck and you will fly! (I don' know who is credited with first saying this time-honored literary pearl.)"

"Fuck a horse.... Enjoy a stable relationship"

"Abortion sure brings out the kid in you."

"I was once slapped in the face by a girl with twelve nipples... (.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.) Sounds weird, dozen tit?"

"Sometimes when i don't want my wife to find something I Put it in her purse"

"pushing an obese dude down a hill wasn't what i had in mind when you asked me if i wanted to roll a fatty."

"What do you call a Zen master from eastern Europe who's been bugging you all day? A Buddha Pest."

"I'm a freshman taking geometry. I can't wait to learn how to tie a hypotenoose."

"Do you know where there are only 239 beans in and Irish bean stew? Because if there was one more, it'd be too farty."

"What's red and smells like paint? Red paint"