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Joke of the Day

"Baby, you're a firework: You hold my interest for about 15 minutes and scare the shit out of my dog."

"So, we're arguing and I've suddenly realized I don't agree with a word I'm saying. Which really ups the degree of difficulty for winning."

"What do you call lonely cheese? Prov-alone"

"What's going be America's largest export once Trump gets elected? Americans."

"Gonna invent a drink called Expresso that's just a cup of bees so people will stop asking for espresso incorrectly."

"What did the police officer say to the man who was urinating publicly? ""Urine trouble, mate!"""

"What's the difference between a blimp and 365 used condoms? One's a Goodyear, the other's an awesome year."

"A Variation on an Old Pun Why did the kids with the fancy bus try so hard? Fo' Frizzle"

"-Here_is=ajoke/for=people/good_at-reading_between|the\lines_"

"I like my coffee, how I like my slaves. free"