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Joke of the Day

"""I may be fat, but you're ugly I can lose weight!"""

"What did the scarecrow say when the farmer asked him in for dinner? ""No thanks, I'm stuffed."""

"Shout out to anyone who is wondering what the opposite of in is."

"Two angels run out of weed... One angel is very upset but the other consoles him. ""fear not,"" he says and points at Jesus. ""for he has resin."""

"Two translators are on a sinking ship... The first says: ""Do you know how to swim?"" The second says: ""No but I can shout for help in 19 different languages"""

"What do you call a bunch of rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare line!"

"Q: Why do women wear makeup and perfume? A: Because they're ugly and they smell bad."

"Breaking News: It turns out OJ Simpsons son actually killed Nicole Brown Simpson. OJ's son asked him if he could have an advance on his allowance. OJ told him ""Go axe yer mother"""

"Whew. Thank you, warning label. I was actually considering using my new floor lamp in the shower."

"Statistics say that there's at least one gay guy in a group of friends, I hope it's Tim ... He's really cute."