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Joke of the Day

"How did the homeless handicap child die? Alone"

"What's the difference between a hockey player and a redneck girl? A hockey player showers after 3 periods."

"So, I'm painting a big blue rectangle in my backyard. So Google Earth will think that I have a pool :/"

"What was the other reindeer's name? Olive. EDIT: Please don't explain and let those suffer who don't understand"

"I saw a really lifelike portrait of Donald Trump the other day... ... it was really freaky how the hands followed you around the room."

"Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before."

"Reddit is like a friend that you think is really funny at first until you realize that they just repeat the same jokes over and over again."

"Men have feelings too. For example, sometimes we feel hungry."

"What does Verizon wireless and abortion clinics have in common? They both have early termination fees"

"Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller? When she went out to buy something she left a sign on her door that said: ""Out Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet"""