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Joke of the Day
"I was visited by three spirits last night, Vodka, Rum And Gin. . ."
Next Joke
"What happened to the Italian chef when he died? He *pasta way*."
"I just woke up and scared the hell out of this mortician."
"12 out of 12 bakers agree, there should be one more baker in this study."
"[interrupts gf talking about her dream wedding] lol a horse drawn carriage? ""what's funny about that?"" a horse can't hold a pencil karen"
"Believe me if you ever saw it, you would even say it glows!"
"Damn girl, are you misplaced silverware? Because why aren't you in the kitchen?"
"""Child rearing"" sounds like something that'll get you life in prison."
"What do you call a laughing mayonnaise? lmayo ahh"
"If Obama wins I'm leaving the country. If Romney wins I'm leaving the country. This is not a political Tweet I just want to travel."