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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Marcus Mariota and Floyd Mayweather? Best Duck Ever."

"North Korea is calling for war. In other news, it's Saturday."

"When I die, I'm not donating my body to science, but I might donate it to the English department and freak the shit out of some people."

"ADDING BLONDE Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key."

"Why is Thor's brother always overlooked? Because he's low key."

"Two fish are in a tank. One turns to the other and says ""Do you know how to drive this thing?"""

"My daughter asked me what marriage is like, so I threw out all her Ken dolls, except for the bald drunk one."

"Did you hear about the angry pancake!? Well one day he ***flipped***!!!"

"What's the best way to cross the border? In the trunk of a car."

"Boy: Our Principal So Stupid Girl:Don't You Know Who i am? Boy: No Girl: I'm The Principal's Daughet. Boy: Do You Know Who i am? Boy: Good (Walks Away)"