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Joke of the Day

"Summer Safety Tip: Before swimming in the ocean, cover yourself in gluten to lower the chances of being eaten by health conscious sharks."

Next Joke
 
"I asked my lawyer cousin, an orthodox Jewish man, his opinion on gay marriage He said ""that would be GREAT for business"""
"Ladies, I adore you, but some of you need to cover up your t*ts and read a book"
"What's the name of a computer that turned into a singer A dell."
"How many Polacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5, one to hold the bulb and 4 to spin the ladder."
"What's Hitler's favorite Chinese food? Lo mein kampf"
"What do you call a fat relative around Halloween? A plump-kin"
"""Please stop misquoting me on Twitter,"" said my boss. ""It makes me sad because I am a large baby with a stupid haircut"""
"yes off course i'm an American My friend calls me up and asks ""Hey are you free tonight?"" And I say of course, I'm American"
"What's the difference between an insurance company and an asshole? If you shove money into an asshole at least you can expect to get shit back"