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Joke of the Day

"A Jewish boy asks his father if he can borrow $50 The father replies, ""$40 dollars?! What do you need $30 dollars for??"""

"Unless you fell off the treadmill and smashed your face, nobody wants to hear about your workout."

"When flying to Prague... ...all of your bags are Czeched"

"Stopped to put air in my tires today. The pump cost $1.50! I remember when those things used to only cost 25 cents. Guess the price has adjusted for inflation."

"What's your new year's resolution? Mine is 1440 * 900."

"I grew up in a town made from wool It was a real close-knit community."

"Consent... The only way to stop rape 100% of the time!"

"My girlfriend was devastated to find out that my mates call me The Love Machine' because I'm terrible at tennis."

"Are you even really committed to going green if you don't use both sides of the toilet paper?"

"What did the tin man say after he was ran over by a steamroller? ""Curses! Foil again!"""