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Joke of the Day
"Why did the chicken attend the seance? To get to the other side."
Next Joke
"A new hospital opens for the first time, and the doctor is getting antsy... ""What are we waiting for?"" the doctor asks. ""Patients, Doctor,"" replied the nurse. ""Patients."""
"I've got 99 problems and 86 of them are completely made up scenarios in my head that I'm stressing about for absolutely no logical reason."
"How do you titillate an ocelot? Oscillate its tit a lot."
"What did the hat say to the scarf? You hang around while I go on ahead. Credit goes to a Laffy Taffy wrapper from some years ago."
"Knock Knock Who's there ? Cook ! Cook who ? Cuckoo yourself I don't come here to be insulted !"
"What did they stamp on the Asian baby as he came out of his mother's womb? Made in Va-China."
"I can describe my girlfriend and 9/11 in one word bush"
"I wonder who they'll get to play the roles of ""Couch"" and ""Phone"" in the movie of my life."
"What's a shy and retiring accountant? An accountant who is half a million shy and that's why he's retiring."