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Joke of the Day

"Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dining room, patio..."

"Not all men are annoying. Some are dead."

"So it's the first of October. I wonder if anyone remembered to wake Green Day up?"

"My doctor wrote me a prescription..... For dailysex, but my girlfriend insists it says dyslexia"

"DATING TIP: On a bad dinner date? Bite your tongue until your mouth fills with blood, say ""I must be allergic to this bread"" and then leave."

"Why is Santa's sack so big??? Well, he only cums once a year..."

"Sure I could get off the couch & put new batteries in this remote but instead I am going to hold it high above my head & at different angles"

"After seeing some of the things posted on /r/Jokes lately, I believe it's time someone finally said something. Something."

"So I saw one of those ""Drink for Pink"" labels on a bottle of juice... Sounds like Georgia Tech's hookup strategy."

"Uma Thurman just got gender reassignment surgery. They're calling it 'the three-inch punch'"