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Joke of the Day

"So Nicole Scherzinger has went from Lewis Hamilton to Ed Sheeran... Well, you know what they say... Orange is the new black."

"ME: Michaelangelo painted the Sistine Chapel on his back? GF: Yep M: [2 hours later] How did he reach the bit between his shoulders?"

"I went to a fight and a hockey match broke out... http://www.sbnation.com/nhl/2015/11/14/9736852/jets-predators-unsportsmanlike-penalties"

"I believe in equality. If we have a 5 day week of work, we should have 5 day weekends as well dammit."

"How can you tell a bernie sanders supporter from a hillary supporter? There age"

"A year on twitter... I remember when all this was fields."

"Why does Santa Claus have such a large sack? He only comes once a year."

"What makes an ISIS joke funny? the execution EDIT: This literally blew up! RIP my inbox"

"i hope people on September 2nd 1885 were flipping out on Back to the Future Part III day"

"Why couldn't the soldier feel his legs? Because his arms were blown off."