5092

Joke of the Day

"Me: This infomercial is so stupid. *10 mins later* Me: So all I have to pay on the 2nd one is the shipping and handling?"

"How would the Mexican Star-Spangled Banner begin? Jose can you see"

"What is a capitalist's favorite fetish? Vore, because it's all about consumption"

"A fruit probably wouldn't travel to Australia But a veggie might"

"How can you tell if a hippy came to your house? He's still there."

"""I just died in your arms"" sounds much more romantic than ""You're holding a dead body."""

"[estate planning] Advisor: Have you thought about an end-of-life gift? Me: I'll be dead, that's a big enough gift for everyone"

"Any salad can be a Caesar salad if you stab it enough."

"How did the tiger escape from the zoo without being spotted? Tigers have stripes."

"A Sober Irishman... ."