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Joke of the Day

"How did the farmer move his cows? In a mooving van!"

"I was admitted to hospital suffering a severe case of sexual frustration but after 48 hours I discharged myself."

"I opened my water and electric bills simultaneously... Needless to say, I was shocked."

"Went to Whole Foods today, because we needed $157 worth of pesto and breads that will be stale in an hour."

"What's the point in getting a Master's degree if you can't even own any slaves?"

"What do you call Brienne's Dad? Tarth Vader."

"It's not often that one gets the opportunity to speak about someone intelligent, respected and admired. Unfortunately tonight I have to talk about (NAME)."

"What do you call a criminal jazz player? Felonius Monk!"

"Found a lump in my testicles, had to get it checked out It was much bigger than the other two"

"""What is the difference between a black pinnochio and a white pinnochio."" The black pinnochio's nose grows wider when he lies."