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Joke of the Day

"What sort of shoes to ninjas wear? Sneakers."

"I was going to post that I'm in Nebraska but Foursquare didn't have the location ""Someone shoot me in the face"" listed."

"I wanna join a gang so I can get in a street fight with a rival gang and intimidatingly snap my fingers to a clever song about friendship."

"Why did the skinhead have Velcro on his boots? He was a lacist."

"Why didn't the hipster want to see the Saint John River and the Penobscot River? They're two Maine streams."

"Had trouble sleeping today. They added a trumpeter to this morning's church service."

"Met a cute guy at the bar, gave him my number and told him to text me when he got home I guess he's homeless."

"What would the blind man say every morning when he walked past the fish market? ""Good morning, ladies!"""

"If I were an attractive girl, I would introduce myself as Hottie McHotterson because I would still be an asshole."

"""I think we should feel other people."" (Blind couple breaking up.)"