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Joke of the Day

"10 years ago, I asked the girl of my dreams out on a date. Today, I asked her to marry me! She said no both times. ( )"

"What do you call a dead fowl that is haunting you? A Poltergeese!"

"Why was the kitten fired from his telemarketing job? For Catcalling"

"I can tell everything I need to know about your business by the thickness of your bathroom toilet paper."

"Why was Pavlov's hair so soft? Because classical conditioning!"

"How to you get rid of the dandelions on your lawn? Paint one of them black; the others will move away."

"Bought an elephant for my friends So I bought my friends an elephant for their room. They said ""Thank you."" I said ""Don't mention it."""

"Q: How are women and rocks alike? A: You skip across the flat ones."

"My love for you is like dividing by zero - it cannot be defined."

"What do you call a dizzy asian? Disorientaled."